TIMECODE | Blog

A few nights ago, I watched (and enjoyed) the 70s cult classic Carrie online. When the movie was finished, Netflix recommended similar offerings I might possibly enjoy, and I sadly discovered that Carrie was remade for TV in 2002. Out of sheer curiosity, and with extremely low expectations, I watched the trailer. Not surprisingly, the TV version looked even worse than I imagined. It was a joke, a perversion of the original; a stale, vapid remake like so many other stale, vapid remakes.

Please, no more bad remakes!

Why bother making it at all? I wondered. Really. Some things should just stand alone as great works. Like The Day the Earth Stood Still. Some things just shouldn’t be remade. Like Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Some things should be remembered with a certain reverence—and not cheaply cloned later on for an easy profit. Like the seminal TV series V. In a world that is exploding with talent, fresh ideas and thousands of aspiring writers jostling for exposure, there’s just no excuse for bad remakes. If you agree, you’ll be amused and encouraged by Joe Queenan’s article “Why does Hollywood keep making the same films?” published in The Guardian. He hits the nail on the head, humorously detailing what we’ve all seen enough of:

“It is said that, after three days, fish and house guests both start to stink. The same is true of movies—by the time you get to the third in a series, the stench is palpable. This is true whether the series is Halloween, The Ring, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre or paranormal romances starring Sandra Bullock.”

Queenan makes some interesting suggestions as to what we should demand more of, which really boil down to films that fulfill three basic criteria: originality, a bit of imagination, and a fully and cleverly developed plot that isn’t totally predictable. Is that really so much to ask for? As Pedro Almodovar says, “No biopics, no prequels, no sequels, no hero movies, no antihero movies, and definitely no superhero movies. Anything else I can handle.” As viewers, I think it’s high time we start saying NO to bad sequels, dumbed-down adaptations of foreign movies, budget-bloated storyless CGI spectacles inspired by video games, fourth rate comic books and, stooping to a pathetic new low, movies inspired by amusement park rides. Driven disproportionately by profit and deathly afraid of risk, Hollywood has become creatively bankrupt. But as Queenan points out, it doesn’t have to be that way. Read the article here.